I'm falling for him

Aku jatuh cinta padanya

Dia yang begitu sempurna

Dia yang bisa membuatku senang hanya karena memikirkannya

Dia yang selalu menemaniku

Dia yang menghidupkan hari-hariku

Dia yang selalu setia

Dia yang percaya padaku

Dia yang selalu menjaga perasaanku

Dia yang tak pernah menyakitiku

Dia yang tak pernah ingin mengkhianatiku

Dia yang menjadi dirinya ketika bersamaku

Dia yang lebih suka diam dan menjadi lebih ceria ketika bersamaku

Dia yang tak pernah ku kenal dengan pasti

Dia yang bersedia menjadi apapun

Dia yang rela ku sakiti

Dia yang tak pernah mengeluh sedikit pun

Dia yang menerima diriku


Dia yang seperti aku bayangkan

Hingga aku tak mampu meraihnya

Aku jatuh cinta padanya

Pada sosok pria fana,

yang ku ciptakan sendiri

dari semua imajinasiku

Mimpi itu

Malam itu, entah hari apa, aku terbangun. Dada ini terasa sesak, aku ingin bernafas secara normal, tetapi seperti ada batu besar yang mengganjal. Rasanya malam itu tidak hujan, tetapi aku merasa dingin. Ada rasa takut yang sangat amat terasa. Bukan rasa takut akan sesuatu hal yang akan ku lihat, tetapi rasa takut akan sesuatu yang akan ku hadapi dan yang baru saja ku rasakan.

Malam itu terasa aneh. Tiba-tiba saja aku terbangun. Rasa takut menyelimutiku dadaku. Aku berusaha untuk mengabaikkannya. Aku takut itu hanya sugesti. Kali ini berbeda, rasa takut itu tak kunjung hilang. Sambil memegang dadaku, aku terus berucap, "Astagfirullahaladzim." Mulutku terus beristigfhar karena hanya itu yang bisa ku lakukan.

Aku berusaha melupakan rasa takut itu. Ku ingat bahwa aku belum belajar untuk ulangan. Saat itu waktu menunjukkan pukul 1 malam. Aku terus belajar hingga jam menunjukkan pukul setengah tiga pagi. Mataku terasa berat. Aku memutuskan untuk tidur. Tetapi rasa takut itu kembali melanda.


Tuhan, ada apa dengan dadaku?
Kenapa terasa sesak?
Aku takut untuk tidur.
Aku takut,
aku tidak bisa membuka kedua mataku esok pagi.

(aku terdiam sejenak, menenangkan pikiran dan mencoba bernafas)

Tuhan, aku pasrah
Kalau esok pagi aku tidak bisa menyambut dunia, semua terserah padaMu.


Saat itu juga, aku pun tertidur..

this feeling mess my day. is that impossible to you to do that?

when you said that things theres only one thing in my mind

im disappointed!!

should i scream and say that i want it so much?

i could tolerate it now

i just believe that God will give it to me

aa -.-

aku benci ketika mulai di perlakukan tidak dihargai.
bagaimana kalau aku yg melakukan itu kepadanya?
apa dia hanya akan terdiam?

Dan aku benci ketika kata "nanti kalau aku mati kamu baru menyesal".
Lalu bagaimana kalo aku yang akan mati duluan?
Apa kamu akan menyesal?

Aku benci ketika kamu merasa kamulah satu satunya yang benar.
kamu tau? kamu terlihat seperti Tuhan.
dan ketika kamu menuntutku untuk menjadi apa yang kau inginkan.
kau hanya terlihat seperti miss perfect!

Dad, in my eyes

Dad, I think about all the things in my life which you have given to me.

You taught me how to fix things that are broken and how to live responsibly.

You even taught me how to be a mechanic by checking the motor oil in my car.

You taught me that money doesnt grow on trees and how to save coins in a jar.

You taught me how to draw animals from numbers and you let me be creative.

You taught me to respect my elders and told folklores of many natives.

You taught me to always be honest and to help others who are in need.

You taught me how to view life and how crooked people can be.

You taught me how to catch a fish and how to bait my own hook.

You taught me all your kitchen secrets including how to cook...

You taught me that every day I will always learn something new.

You taught me that if I needed anything I could always count on you...

You taught me to think positive and to always look ahead.

You taught me to how to use all those handy tools in your shed.

You taught me how to live life to its fullest and to always smile.

You taught me that if it is meant to be then fate would always allow.

You taught me how to appreciate even the little things.

You taught me to be me and encouraged me to spread my wings.

Dad, you have taught me so many wonderful things

And you have inspired me in so many ways.... to live, love and laugh everyday.

You are everything that I am today and I just wanted to say...


*copas*

How precious you are for me!

I ask nothing to you. You're always misunderstanding to me.
Always have negative thought of me. Am i so bad?

I dont wanna make you cry. Never! But there's always misunderstanding between us.
You're so worth for me. I do whatever you want.
Even its not something i want. I give you everything, even my life.
However you dont need to give nothing to me.

I dont ask you to buy it. NO! I ask God to give what i want.
Thanks for realizing me that only God will give me everything.

Do whatever you want and be happy.
I dont ask your money.
But i'll prove i can reach my goal.

Forgive all my mistake, mom.
Even while crying now, i only hope you're happy out there.
I love you, Mom.

We Called Her, Mom.

Mom,
sorry for the bad times and thank you for the good times
Mom,
sorry for not saying i love you, but thank you for your overflowing love
Mom,
sorry for not defending you, but thank you for protecting me
Mom,
sorry for not laughing, but thank you for the funny thing
Mom,
sorry for making you sad but, thank you for your forgiviness

I'm sorry for the troubles and the worries I brought you
I'm sorry for my mistakes, I didn't mean to make you blue
I'm sorry for every bad thing I've ever done or said
I'm sorry that I can't be what you want me to be
I'm sorry that loving me caused you so much hurt
I'm sorry that I have done nothing for you

I never meant to hurt you, mom
The way I know I have
Your love means more to me than anything and I'll do whatever it takes to prove that to you